I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize