Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
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