I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
