So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
3pm strippers are depressing
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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