this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
