Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....