so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
