Just mADE A PArabola og urine
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
