STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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