I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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