why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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