hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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