My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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