if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
