Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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