OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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