he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Found your dick twin last night
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
