Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
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