I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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