I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
areolas are like halos for boobs.
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just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
We're too hungover to prance.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment