Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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