bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
