I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
if only i could text you this smell
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
