"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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