I faked an abortion last night.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
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