yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
My vagina is very pro this idea
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
