I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
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I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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