you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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