I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
