I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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