I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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