Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
