Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize