the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
My ass is underappreciated
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
not ubering you a puppy
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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