His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
