she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize