you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize