That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
No...this little piggys going to the bar
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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