Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I just threw up on my dentist
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
