Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize