something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
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he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
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He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.