just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
are you so shy because you have an std?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
