I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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