just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize
