Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize