I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
