She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
