If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I need moral support for this bender
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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