weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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