oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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