I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize